I find myself pondering how we got to this place. How virtually every single relationship we engage in or are exposed to is adversarial in nature, and that any one that is not adversarial to begin with is somehow turned into one. In the 90s, we were all about the yin and yang, the black and white, where it was all about complementarity and balance. That wasn’t so long ago, was it?
Now, today, it’s all about black vs. white, man vs. woman, young vs. old, rich vs. poor, etc. It’s exhausting, and I truly believe that this is by design. We seem to no longer be allowed to respect and celebrate our differences in a healthy and productive manner. Every interaction he have has to be for the purpose of overpowering, overtaking, destroying, and replacing. It simply doesn’t appear to be sufficient that we should be happy with all that we bring to the table to fill the voids left by others who are strong in the places we are not.
The pervasive message that is being is that being who you are, as you are, simply isn’t good enough, and that what’s more is that it’s someone else’s fault, and that that person needs to be taken down in order for you to feel good enough. Tell me, exactly how does that jibe with the constant line we’ve been fed in the past few years about being true to oneself and loving yourself as you are?
If one talks about the enslavement of Africans, another will counter it with the indentured servitude of the Irish, another will chime in with the enslavement of the Israelites by the Egyptians, and another with the Holocaust. Can’t we all agree that it was ALL bad, and that what seems to be the defect here is with the human and is NOT exclusive to any one race or ethnicity?
There is a always a competition for who is more aggrieved. A person can’t even make an observation or express a lament without someone else coming along and telling them there they or someone else has it so much worse. Or, they try to invalidate the argument by citing an exception to the rule. This is not conducive to healthy dialogue or understanding. We seem to no longer be interacting for the sake of understanding or cooperation, but for the sake of creating more division. For the splitting into tribes, and even subtribes, and it seems that anyone who doesn’t want to play that game and compartmentalize themselves like that is either placed in a tribe by force or ostracized altogether. Sometimes, you’re not even allowed to call for unity and compromise. None of this is healthy.
Tell me, who has this kind of energy? To constantly be embattled? Why do we allow it? To anyone who has this kind of energy, from what other more pressing issue is it being siphoned? Your family? Your friends? Your job? Opportunities at self-betterment?
So what do we do about this? How to come away from this? What is the point of no return? Have we adopted a Scorched Earth policy? What is the end game? And in the end, will it have been worth it?